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Abandon: Wild state in which a sailor acquires a boat.? Aboard: 1). A piece of construction lumber.? 2). What one becomes when one is a-uninterested. Above Board: Above decks, therfore, meaning to be out in the open, visible to all; honest, straight forward, etc. Abreast:? An object searched for by male lookouts. Only one? Afterguy: Last guy out of the bar. American Practical Navigator (Bowditch): Ancient nautical treatise, generally though to deal with navigation, which to the present day has resisted all attempts to decipher it. Often found on board ship as a decorative element or paperweight. Amidships: Condition of being surrounded by boats. Anchor: 1). Any of a number of heavy, hook-shaped devices that is dropped over the side of the boat on the end of a length of rope and/or chain, and which is designed to hold a vessel securely in place until (a) the wind exceeds 2 knots, (b) the owner and crew depart, or (c) 3 a. m. 2. ) A device designed to bring up mud samples from the bottom at inopportune or unexpected times.?? 3). The thing rotting in the bilge of every racing yacht (unseen). Anchor Light: A small light used to discharge the battery before daylight.? Azimuth Bar: Where Azimuths hang out. Backstay: 1). What unsteady folks should do in heavy weather. 2). The last thing to grab as your falling overboard. Baggywrinkle: Effect of sun and salt spray on your face. Bar: 1). Long, low-lying navigational hazard, usually awash, found at river mouths and harbor entrances, where it is composed of sand or mud, and ashore, where it is made of mahogany or some other dark wood. Sailors can be found in large numbers around both. Land based nesting and pre-mating natural habitat frequented by sailors when they force themselves to go ashore. Bare Boat: Clothing optional or sailing naked. Bar Buoy: What you will be looking for to lead you to a good time. Bare Poles: Sailing with unclothed persons from Eastern Europe. Barometer: Meteorological instrument which sailors use to confirm the onset of bad weather. It's readings, together with heavy rain, severe rolling, high winds, dark skies and deep cloud cover indicate the presence of a storm. Battery: Electrochemical storage device capable of lighting a lamp of wattage approximately equal to that of a refrigerator lamp for a period of 15 minutes after having been charged for two hours. Beam Sea: A situation in which waves strike a boat from the side, causing it to roll unpleasantly. This is one of the four directions from which wave action tends to produce extreme physical discomfort. The other three are bow sea' (waves striking from the front), following sea' (waves striking from the rear), and `quarter sea' (waves striking from any other direction). Beating to windward: A method of flogging crew to increase upwind performance when racing. Berth: 1). Any horizontal surface whose total area does not exceed one half of the surface area of an average man at rest, onto which at least one liter of some liquid seeps during any 12-hour period and above which there are not less than 10 kilograms of improperly secured objects. Little newborn addition to the crew. 3). Sometimes the result of removing the last article of clothing. Bifurcation Buoy: Buoy that you can't tell if its coming or going. Binoculars: Entertainig shipboard kaleidoscope which when held up to the light reveals interesting patterns caused by salt spray scratches and thumb prints. Uncapped, its lens may be used to collect small amounts of salt from spray through evaporation. Bitter End: Finish of a race when you are last over the line. Wrong end of a siphon hose.? Time to alert the bartender in the English pub. BOAT: 1). Break Out Another Thousand. A hole in the water surrounded by wood/plastic/steel/aluminium into which you pour all your money. BOAT Bucks: Monetary unit for yachties, for the sake of simplicity with a fixed conversion ratio of 1. 000 with the local currency. Boat ownership: 1). Standing fully-clothed under a cold shower, tearing up 100-dollar bills. Boat ownership is like riding in a convertible with the top down in a cold rainstorm, steadily throwing 100 dollar bills out the window. Except for the fact, that you cannot actually ride in the boat, because it is broken. Boom: 1). Laterally mounted pole to which a sail is fastened. Often used during jibing to shift crew members to a fixed, horizontal position. Loud noise made during a surprise jibe sometimes quieted by a grinder before swimming. Sound made when a spirit stove is used to convert boat into a liquid asset. 4). Also called boom for the sound that's made when it hits crew in the head on its way across the boat. For slow crew, it's called `boom, boom. ' Boomkin: Small, very young boom, less than one year old. Bos'n: Short for Boatswain, pronounced "bosun", the person in charge of the deck crew, and the deck and rigging in general. In the modern Navy the Bos'n is a Warrant Officer, while a Bosn's Mate is a Petty Officer. Bottom Characteristics: With regard to human beings, the definition speaks for itself. Bottom Paint: 1). What you get when the cockpit seats are freshly painted. The most dented can of paint.? Bow: 1). The part of the boat that no one should have to work on.? 2). Temporary section of an offshore Catamaran. A physical act performed to acknowledge those who are applauding your fine sailing skills. 4).? Gesture from the helmsman as he crosses the finish line first.? 5).? Best part of the ship to ram another with.? 6).? Front part of multihulls often found underwater.? 5).? What you do after performing an outstanding docking maneuver. Boxing The Compass: What you might attempt to foolishly do after drunkenly returning to the ship. Brass Monkey Weather: Refers to very cold weather. Broach: Piece of jewelry that you would not want to wear in heavy weather at sea. Broad Reach: How a lady of the evening might grab at you as you walk down a dimly lit pier. Bulkhead: 1). A very anal retentive sailor (see also Stern). Discomfort suffered by sailors who drink too much. Uni-sex bathroom.? 4). Discomfort suffered by sailors who drink too much.? 5). Boater with a very large cranium. Bunk: 1). A small uncomfortable area for wet sailors to attempt sleep. 2).? Location to store unused sails. Buoy:? 1). Opposite of girlie or flying gull.? 2). Navigational aid. There are several types and colors of buoys of which the most numerous are:? -green can (seen as a fuzzy black spot on the horizon)? -red nun (seen as a fuzzy black spot on the horizon)? -red or green day beacon(seen as a fuzzy black spot on the horizon), and? -vertically striped black-and-white channel marker (seen as a fuzzy black spot on the horizon) Burdened Vessel: The boat which, in a collision situation, did not have the right-of-way. See PRIVILEGED VESSEL. Captain: See FIGUREHEAD Calm: Sea condition characterized by the simultaneous disappearance of the wind and the last cold beverage. Can Buoy:? (Pronounced Can BOY) Male with diarrhea. Canvas: An abrasive sailcloth used to remove excess skin from knuckles Capsize: Interior diameter of any piece of headgear, usually expressed in inches [sometimes kilometers]. Catamaran: Boat design involving two hulls therefore twice as likely to hit something or develop a leak, yet taking twice as long to sink. Cathead(s):? Popular menu item in some overseas food stores. Caulk: Any one of a number of substances introduced into the spaces between planks in the hull and decking of a boat that give a smooth, finished appearance while still permitting the passage of a significant amount of seawater. Celestial Fix: What you need every day. Chart: Large piece of paper that is useful in protecting cabin and cockpit surfaces from food and beverage stains.? Type of nautical map which tells you exactly where you are aground or what you just hit. Charley Noble: Many a rookie sailor has been sent to find Charley Noble. Usually after much searching and being unable to find the person named, he will eventually discover that Charley Noble is the galley stove pipe. This is akin to being put on lookout duty for the mail buoy. Chine: Word used after, "rise and... " What the sun does. Chock: 1). Sudden and usually unpleasant surprise suffered by Spanish seaman. Full right up to here... Circuit Breaker: An electromechanical switching unit intended to prevent the flow of electricity under normal operating conditions and, in the case of a short circuit, to permit the electrification of all conductive metal fittings throughout the boat. Available at most novelty shops. Clew: Evidence leading to recovery of a missing sail.? Indication from the skipper as to what he might do next.? Oriental crewmember.? What a new sailor often doesn't have any of. Cloud Bank: Where you store clouds, which gather interest for future use. Club, Yacht Club, Racing Association: Troublesome seasonal accumulation in costal areas of unpleasant marine organisms with stiff necks and clammy extremities. Often present in large numbers during summer months when they clog inlets, bays, and coves, making navigation almost impossible. The infestations are most serious along the coasts of Conneticut, Massachusetts, and Maine. They can be effectively dislodged with dynamite, but, alas, archaic federal laws rule out this option. COB: 1). Cash Over Board. Play ducks and drakes with BOAT's Coiled: Relatively mild upper respiratory ailment commonly contracted at sea by sailors from Brooklyn. Comfort: A term not used in conjunction with racing yachts (see also Interior). Command: Mnemonic used to remember how orders at sea are to be given: Confuse Obscure Mispronounce Mumble Abbreviate Nasalize Drool. Companionway: 1. ) Another name for a hole to fall into. (see also Hatch) 2. ) A double berth. 3) Narrow channel. Compass: Navigational instrument that... indicates the presence of machinery and magnets on board ship by spinning wildly.? Co-Tidal Hour: Not to be confused with coital hour, which is somethin
The half shirt fad going on is horrendous. (i.e. the eyeball shirt on the left at 2:17 ) Leave something to the imagination. And it's not creative anymore if EVERY other girl (or guy) wears it. It was once an eyesore to people who simply didn't like the look to begin with, and now it's an eyesore to everyone who remembers what the last person wore.? Miley? Minaj? Lopez? Sooooo sick of them undermining their real talent just to bear too much skin because they think that's what people always want to see. It's not what we always want to see. For example, Jennifer Lopez is smart and a natural beauty but she's dumbing herself down by over exposing her body in place of her talent.? I just wanted to pick at that one fashion fad. I personally like some of the looks in this clip, btw. The golden shoes on the left at 2:40 are pretty and I'd wear those.
Wtf. Never man never. I think these are Much Nicer than those Long Summer Dresses That Ladies Have To hold onto All Day.
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