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Can someone write the lyric please ?. Watch movie lost in america series. Watch movie lost in america download. Loved the ending. Alice is a scary-sexy, tall dark and sinister handsome man. Losing the love of your life would affect anyone. And I was no exception. Bjorn and I’d been together for well over ten years... A decade of bliss now gone to despair. Bjorn was a tall Swede. Complete with intelligence, accent, and an ass and dick to spare. His chiseled good looks and blue eyes captivated me from the start. Up until the day he died from an aneurysm. And now Bjorn’s gorgeous features haunted my dreams... The few times I felt joy in this cold, distant world. I’d lost weight since he passed. Both from stress and sadness. About the only good thing to come out of this personal tragedy. And now I stayed home every night. Alone in a fortress of horror movies and countless cats. My only companions at this point. Besides the pills. Like a haunted castle, the house of Bjorn and I reeked of desolation. Loneliness. I couldn’t escape our framed photos. Our shared love of weird feline figurines. I didn’t want to really… They were all I had left of him and our gorgeous memories. I worked from home so never got out much. This suburban prison perfect for my misery. To think at one point, I was the life of the party. The outgoing smartass to Bjorn’s reserved professor. Now I was the gay male equivalent to a cat lady… Until one day my close friend Geoffrey talked me off the loneliness ledge. He was my old flame turned confidante. His advice usually sound. And here he was the one talking me into trying modern romance: dating apps. I took his advice. I told the world who I was on Tinder, Bumble… and yes, even Grindr. Hell, I even used Marc, my real name. I wasn’t here to catfish… just to try and move on. I knew Bjorn still would’ve wanted me to considering I was only forty-four. Regardless of all the weight loss and stress, I was still attractive. All these bios and decisions were tough. I mentioned I was Filipino. A horror movie fan. And to honor Bjorn, I chose my most scholarly photo: me in my wire-rimmed glasses and tweed single-breasted jacket. My dark coiffed combover. Of course, I mentioned I was a kinky bottom as well. There was a thrill with each app. I enjoyed the attention, the compliments. All the conversations with these gay caricatures: the twinks, the bears, the “straight” jocks. The variety of sexy ethnicities. There were white guys, black guys, Latinos. I didn’t discriminate against beauty. But nothing went anywhere. Sure, I was popular. It was fun playing the cute older Filipino freak. But aside from some fun sexting and video chats, I felt no human connection. Hell, I had deeper conversations with my cats at this point. Or inside my own crazy mind! So yeah, everyone got masturbation material. The majority of the reason why Millennials use these things, I figured. But If I wanted to just look at ass and dicks all day or show off my own, I’d just go on Reddit. You know. The quick, efficient way. I also noticed a disturbing trend... A harrowing realization that I was one of very few forty-year-olds using Tinder and Bumble. One of the very few who wasn’t a serial killer or ugly as shit, that is. And there was still an empty void on these sites: where were the fucking Swedes? Call it a fetish to be an asshole or my type to be polite, but my lurid lust for Swedish men compelled me. It consumed me! Growing more frustrated, I continued this app adventure. Going through the more obscure ones like an explorer journeying into a most mysterious wilderness. Sitting on my living room couch, surrounded by cats and pictures of Bjorn and I’s happy past, I scanned the list. My glass of wine no relief to the rising irritation. Every fucking fetish was well-represented. Every race, every gender. Even sites geared toward scat play, shitting, and farting. Just nothing specifically for Swedes! What the fuck! But deep down, I knew beggars can’t be choosers. Here I was unable to find a free app for us forty-somethings. At a loss for how to find someone close to my age who at least attempted to be attractive. Much less not be terrifying... I took another annoyed sip. Gazed off at the flatscreen. At 2014’s Creep... One of Bjorn and I’s favorites. The memories moved me. Both good and bad. Bittersweet bullets into my soul. Turning, I forced myself back to my phone. Toward this futile search fueled by a lonely man’s heartbreak and horniness. Then there was the March miracle. The one I’d been waiting for: a new app was at the bottom of the search pile. SexySwedes read the icon’s big red letters. A New Modern Dating App For Mature Crowds I tapped the icon in a frenzy. The most excitement I felt since Bjorn and I’s late Friday nights in the sack. Everything got more promising. Sure, there were pics of hot Swedish men who were real on screen but likely bots behind keyboards. But there was the free price tag. The thirty-five and older age requirement. And most of all, the app’s real hook: Introducing Our New Review Feature: Comments And Observations Made After Dates What the fuck, I thought to myself. Somewhere between disgusted by our dwindling human condition… yet allured by this Amazon of dating. Customer reviews toward… human beings? But fuck, the promise of hot, muscular Swedes was too much. I downloaded that shit in a heartbeat. I toured the terrain. To my surprise, Americus, Georgia was apparently America’s Stockholm. I wasn’t buying this cash grab exploiting us Swede addicts until I read the reviews. The barbs directed at almost every guy here, both Swedish and American. No reviews were over two out of five stars. In fact, most of them stayed at one or zero. Complete with nice zingers like: Uglier in person, broke ass shit, useless! 1 and his breath stank, Cattfish. dis uglyass bitch fat, lied about dick dic tiny, Not a Swede. This was a woman and an ugly one. I figured no site would air these freakshows out for everyone to see. Not one trying to scam desperate lonelyhearts anyway. So I navigated through this sea of shit. At the very least, entertained by all the negative reviews. And then I saw Charlie. With just over three-and-a-half stars, Charlie was just the man I was looking for: a perfect Swede… much like Bjorn. The reviews were positive. Not that I cared at this point... His profile pic had him holding a cute cat for Christ’s sake! I sent the first message. Much to my relief, Charlie replied quick. We hit it off immediately. Exchanged pics. Exchanged personalities. Charlie was a computer programmer and only a few years younger than me. The shot at a realistic romance was becoming all the more apparent. Even on such a strange app... Playing the cute geek to perfection, Charlie wore glasses. Had spiked brown hair. Weird fashion. At 5'10, maybe he was a little less lean than Bjorn but Charlie still had the big dick and booty to make up for it. And above all, he was just genuine. Charming. The first guy I talked to my age that came without creep vibes… much less literal red flags. We met in person soon. And for the first time since Bjorn, I felt excitement. Hope. The closest to Bjorn’s goofy charm I could find. I now felt alive. Not to mention hot... Together, we toured Americus. The romantic spots, the restaurants. Over in Plains, we shared our first kiss. I led the charge, of course. I went straight for Charlie’s mouth, my face pressing against his pointed nose. Our chemistry was explosive. The sex fantastic. Finally, I felt a connection. And fuck, at this point, even our cats got along. We took turns spending the night at each other’s houses. Mine in suburbia, Charlie’s out in the country. The relationship grew stronger, the bond deeper. And deep down, I knew Bjorn would approve. But the app still lingered. I checked SexySwedes from time to time. Not for a fuck buddy or sext buddy. Just out of amusement. A compulsion. Yeah, the guys were hot… but how’d I end up with the only one over two stars? I get I was attractive but I wasn’t a conventionally fine hottie… Still, I wasn’t worried. I was happy. Charlie and I had a chance. We got closer. Only I got more hesitant. Bjorn wanted me to move on… He even told me so. But this didn’t feel right. Not being this happy without him. Not this level of joy. Maybe I should’ve considered happiness normal. Common in the real world… but man, it was tough. Especially considering my best memories came with Bjorn and Bjorn only. I ended up breaking up with Charlie. I just wasn’t ready. Not emotionally. Or maybe I was too scared... Too afraid our new love would obfuscate my old one. Truly bury Bjorn. Either way, I ended it. A beautiful romance halted before it could fully blossom. Hey, at least, I did it in person. At the downtown square, Charlie shook his head in sadness. The overcast day setting a mood neither of us wanted. But a funeral I felt was necessary. “But Marc…” he started. I couldn’t say much. Behind the glasses, I felt tears forming. “I thought we were doing great, ” Charlie said. Conflicted, I stepped beside one of the small trees. Cowering from my own cowardness. Bjorn wouldn’t have been proud. Charlie grabbed my shoulder. A soft touch. “Is it something I did? ” Like a sentimental soap opera that felt all too real, I faced him. “No. ” The pain squeezed my soul. “I’m just not ready for this. ” I took a step back. The March breeze whipping through my coat. “I never was. ” “But Marc-” I interrupted him with a kiss. Our last goodbye. Over the next few days, I ignored all of Charlie’s calls. His texts. Instead, I kept busy at the house. Feeding cats, watching horror movies. Staring at the photos of Bjorn and I. Watching our videos. Drifting into the dream… Finally, I got drunk (and horny) enough to fuck with the apps again. Naturally, my first selection was SexySwedes. Not necessarily to find a mate... Just some dick. Well
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